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Alternate Christmases are sometimes the only solution. For instance, my aunt has 3 kids, and they all have 2 kids each. She lives in Ohio, the kids live in Ohio/Kentucky. The inlaws are in Georgia, Texas, and Colorado. So, my cousin's go to my aunt's on even years and to their inlaws on odd years. They had considered breaking it up so that their mom would always have at least one of them home for Christmas at all times, but she said she'd rather spend alternate Christmases alone than to live with the thought that they'd never all be together for Christmas again. You just have to find something that works and go with it. Alternate Christmases are better than nothing. Same with Birthdays.
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