What's in it? My youngest still doesn't use it or even need it. I, on the other hand, and my oldest, have to use it or we can't get a brush through our hair. What does conditioner do to make it work so well?

It replaces the oils that washing your hair strips away. Have you ever considered stopping washing with shampoo? It's very harsh. Anything with a sodium laural sulfate is hard on your hair AND it is absorbed through your skin. I use a baking soda paste to scrub my scalp clean, and then follow that with rinsing the ends with apple cider vinegar. the vinegar makes the hair smooth and shiny, and oh so nice.