A friend of mine just found out she will get her first grandchild in a couple months (how her daughter hid it all this time I have no idea) and she has already started researching the list of furniture her daughter wants for the baby to determine if its safe and so she can start buying it along with her ex-husband (and I'm talking every piece of furniture, not just the big stuff). Her ex-husband just went out and bought a new car so he could give his 15 thousand dollar SUV to her, trading for her 3 thousand dollar Mustang which he intends to sell. I could never conceive of dumping such large amounts of money on my children once they were grown enough to get married and have kids. I mean her daughter is 26 years old and this is already her second marriage. What point should parents decide they need to teach their kids to be financially responsible for themselves? Or do some parents never reach that point?

The parents may never reach that point but it doesn't mean that it is appropriate. By that age she should be well capable of providing for herself, and if she isn't then it's time to learn. Are they going to support her till her children graduate college?

They might have to. She dropped out of college not once but twice. And her newest husband barely graduated high school and works as a general laborer. Not exactly going to be pulling in a decent living once he gets old or gets hurt badly the first time. I've tried talking to my friend but she feels its her job to spoil her kids even if they need to be grown ups.

Thats fine to help out, but you gotta cut the ties at some point. I have seen a couple of people my age that their parents passed on, and after wards my friends were like 3 year olds, depending on every single thing in life from their parents.

Does the parent wonder what will happen when their gone? Its not something nice to think about, but what happens when it does? Who will take care of that entire family then?

Once they are gone then the children may well inherit sufficient an amount that they do not need to worry about providing for themselves any more. I mean the parents have to be reasonably well off to be able to keep doing this now, so maybe it won't be a problem.