What do you do if your teenager starts making bad choices? Fooling around? Hard drugs? Partying, etc? What are your guys's views?

I think it really depends the issue in hand. I have two children, a 5 year old son from a previous engagement, and a girl who is barely under a year now. All three of us (parents) have had our own "stupid" times in life, and had the chance to learn from our own mistakes.

I am between 'let them learn their own' and 'help them to avoid making one to start with'.

I think a better idea, would be to state just one thing that can hypothetically happen, and let us all answer that, and pick and choose from what you learn from us "old" parents now. :)

I dont know, I was a handful for my Mom, I think I still am. :p

At some point you have to choose your battles. Your childs life is worth them hating you for a few years.
If my child started doing that stuff, they would find themselves in military school faster than they could spit. I would do anything to help my child. I do not think it is okay for parents to be friends, nor is it okay to just turn the other cheek. IMO, its our JOB to make sure they understand EVERYTHING they do in life is a choice and has consequences.

I'm with you 1moretime ! Kids have enough friends, they need parents, and that is precisely the problem with a lot of children now, they do NOT have parents.

Our kids knew the 'rules' and there were consequences for breaking rules. If I found out one of my children were messing with drugs, let alone 'hard drugs'...I would take desparate action. I think it is our job as parents to get them on the 'right' road. And doubt anyone would say the right road includes drug use. Did I ? yep, but I also had NO parents to speak of either.

I chose my battles, and let the rooms be a mess, or whatever, I would ask myself 'does this reallllllllllly matter?' or is this a big deal that could lead to other problems down the road.

Our kids were raised 'strict' by todays standards, they didn't go to homes that didn't have parents there. We had to meet the kids or talk to the parents before they were allowed to go for a visit or overnight, or certainly a party to assure there would be adults present. Did it piss our (then) teenagers off? You bet it did. But they are 29 and 26 now, never been in any 'trouble', own their own homes, have decent jobs, and are good young adults and parents themselve.

Rarely is a child harmed by a 'strict' loving upbringing, but you can see the harmful effects of lenient, 'friend' parents all around unfortunately. I always told the kids I would 'error' on the side of caution and too 'strict' rather than 'premissiveness''. And they now of course agree.:) Also always said that if a kid doesn't 'hate' their parent at some time during their childhood, that parent has not done a good job!

We have all made choices in our life that I'm sure we wish we could go back and change. Nothing too major in my life, otherwise I would not be who I am now. I have learned from everything so far in my life, even when it takes a little longer to get through my thick skull, I don't have any regrets, but yes I would have changed some minor things if I could.

I let my kids make some of their own mistakes, not all, but some. Otherwise they have no freewill to do anything. I have also noticed depending on the child's upbringing and how much freedom you give them, depends if they are smart enough to hang their selves or not. :)

I agree both that kids have to make some mistakes and learn by them, and that we have to pick our battles. But honestly how do you handle drugs? There is no way you can just let that be, and it's a battle that everyone must agree has to be tackled. But other than checking the kid into rehab what do we do?