janelle

My friend has a younger sister who is 10 years younger than her. These two sisters are as different as night and day. My friend is very calm and laid back and has always been very well behaved. Her sister is quite the opposite. She is 21 and has really put her parents through the mill. She has always been very demanding and aggressive and wants things her way all the time. She has went through men like changing socks and has never had any self control with spending money. Her idea of a good time is hitting the bars every weekend and getting blasted out of her mind.
My friend on the other hand really has her life together. She's a college grad, has a great career, owns her own home, and is happily married. Their parents blame themselves for the younger sisters behavior. They say it's because there was so many years between the daughters and that the younger one was spoiled. While being spoiled may have something to do with it, I really don't feel the age difference does. I think the younger sister has made these bad choices on her own. What do you all think?

AmandaBuckley

I really think it depends on the person itself. My brother and I are 2 years apart and are as different as night and day too. My mom always says she does not know what she did wrong. But I think we were raised the same way, everyone meets different friends, and makes different choices.

Karie

Of course they can be too far apart. The only thing that does is just makes it so your kids are not very close. They won't have the same interests, or be at the same points in their lives.

Casey

Sometimes an unforeseen pregnancy can make the age differences large. If a family intentionally decides to wait several years for their next child, then who can say 'it's too far apart'. That was a decision the parents opted for and the children may or may not have a close relationship.

Arial

I don't think being far apart has anything to do with the younger sister's behavior. It sounds like she was spoiled and that can happen with or without big age gaps. Maybe the parents spoiled her because they knew she was going to be the last child. Regardless, she is an adult now and she is making some bad choices, but there isn't much anyone can do. She is old enough to take control of her own life and hopefully she will grow up soon.

rose

We have some gaps in the years with myself and siblings, even with cousins too. Maybe there was a certain time when this was more popular than the current times now??

Lauren_3354

I agree with Arial. It sounds like major spoiling took place. As to the gaps, I personally plan to have my kids as close together as possible so they can grow up together and experience stages at the same time. Nothing like having your sibling be your best friends.

mommyof3

I am a part of a family like this-my sister and I are in our 30's and we have 2 younger siblings in their early 20's. I have to say that although we were raised by the same people it was different because when my sister and I were growing up my parents were in their 20's-30's. Now they are in their 50's. They got tired and it just got easier to let the younger ones get what they want.

JDdad

I think it is all about the last child just getting spoiled. My sister and I are 4 years apart and we also are night and day different. I think they babied her too much when she was little and she got away with stuff becuase she was the youngest.

Bun

I know someone who has a 21-year-old and a young child (I think under 10, but I can't remember the exact age). This wasn't necessarily her choice, but just what happened. The children are/have been raised the same.

I think that while babying the "last" one may have some bearing, and age of parents may, the main thing is that each of us makes our own choices - and that goes for adult (and nearly-adult) children as well.